The Sunbaked King

The Sad Days of August

Perhaps it is better not to expect.

When a person tries too hard to achieve happiness, he ends up disappointing himself. For in that moment he utters the words “I am going to be happy today,” the universe will decide to conspire against him. It will send its most notorious agent, Murphy, to make sure that anything that can go wrong will go wrong. Like waking up at 8:30 AM on a working day. Like getting wet in the rain. Like arriving two hours late. Like having to redo your previous hard-worked, over-timed, non-paid efforts. Like eating at a lousy restaurant. Like watching a disastrous movie. Like fighting over something petty. Like failing to get a cab while it’s raining. Like getting food poisoned. Like shitting like crazy. Like sleeping with unresolved issues.

Like confusion. Like loneliness. Like defeat.

Like feeling incomplete.

These sad days make me wonder: am I forcing myself on people who do not want me, in a lifestyle that does not suit me, and in a frame of mind that does not speak of me?

That last paragraph is totally off-tangent, but so has everything these past few days. And given the propensity of the universe to create chaos in the most ironic of times, it will probably send its worst tricks right smack in the middle of the month, right smack in the middle of my birthday. 

But then again, perhaps it is better not to expect.

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Filed under: Ra

11 Responses

  1. makmak says:

    Aw. I have a great dislike of Murphy as well. But I’ve read from somewhere that succeeding events are the indirect results of our reaction to a preceding circumstance. Simply, if we choose to react negatively to an unfortunate incident, like waking up late, or getting wet in the rain, or arrive two hours late, or having to work on a task you have previously finished, yada yada, then everything will most likely turn for the worse.

    So as much as possible, I dwell on the misery for a second and then shrug it all off. It’s just a fluke in an otherwise semi-perfect universe that I’m living in. 🙂

    Hey, hope the rest of August will be better for you.

  2. joeysince1983 says:

    omg, it’s always this time of year… waaaa! 😦

    well, sometimes the path to happiness means having to lose a lot along the way, even yourself (referring to your off-tangent paragraph). siyempre, in the end, you have to choose what’s best for yourself. 😀 (lolz, ang drama :p)

    “But then again, perhaps it is better not to expect.” – yes, don’t.

  3. sidemirror says:

    Blog-hopping. 🙂

    “For in that moment he utters the words “I am going to be happy today,” the universe will decide to conspire against him. ”

    Nature never, NEVER, fails to do that.

  4. hodgepodge says:

    “I am going to be happy today.” – actually this can be done even with all the rain and these “negative” forces.

    Actually, just thinking about being happy will probably bring you some but it does not stop there. You must feel it and act on it.

    So instead of saying “I am going to be happy today”, what should be thought of is “I AM HAPPY TODAY!”. The former is so conditional that your happiness depends on the circumstances of the day. But if you think, feel and act HAPPY deep inside, no negative circumstance can dampen your mood. 🙂

    and I’m also continuously working on that.

    🙂

  5. kerwinray says:

    @ Mak: It’s pretty much a chain reaction, right? Once you react negatively to one thing, it will drastically affect how you perceive the next “bad” event that comes your way. I guess I fell into a spiraling loop of negativity.

    I’m feeling much better now, thanks.

    @ Joey: Haha! Focus sa off-tangent paragraph. Yes, I’m not expecting anymore. It’s better that way.

    Why is it always this time of the year, no? I can look through my previous blog entries and there’s always something in August.

    @ Sidemirror: Welcome! Glad you stumbled into my blog. And: isn’t it weird how nature does that? We just have to cope. That’s what the others here are saying. 🙂

    @ Hodgepodge: Trust me, I’m pretty much the optimist. It’s just that… that day pretty much sucked. It’s hard to “think happy” when one negative event is immediately replaced by another. Other times, though, I’m really predisposed to loving the universe. Haha.

  6. alfrenzy says:

    hoist! disastrous movie = journey to the center of the earth? lousy restaurant = aveneto rip-off resto? hey! we took pics with fuwas, that should’ve cheered you up. juxtapose?

  7. kerwinray says:

    Alfie! Wrong day! Wrong day! I wrote that August 3! Hahaha. 🙂

    Disastrous movie = The Mummy
    Lousy restaurant = Mangan

    I enjoyed yesterday a lot. 😀 Nice to see you guys again.

    Fuwas? IS THE BESTEST.

    (And High School Musical, too.)

    P.S. Come to think of it, the description of the day was really close! Haha. No wonder you thought it was yesterday.

  8. tristan says:

    i think na-project ni alfie ang own feelings niya about the non-3d movie-going experience that was ALSO headlined by brendan frasier(spelling?).

    better sana yung HS Musical pics if it was in 3d. juxtapose!

  9. kerwinray says:

    Fraser yata. I’ll change my spelling, too. 🙂 Hahaha.

    Juxtaposition rocks! 🙂

  10. Joseph says:

    Hello there.

  11. kerwinray says:

    Hello, Joseph. 🙂

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